by | Aug 5, 2020

Attachment to spiritual things is… just as much an attachment as inordinate love of anything else. ~ Thomas Merton.

The principles of attachment theory teach us that most people are only as needy as their unmet needs. We all have needs, wants and desires; these generally have different meanings dependent on gender. How much we depend on each other to meet this trilogy determines our level of attachment. Only when we can let go of an attachment to anything and feel freedom from it, can we acquire it. We’re all dependent on the people we’re attached to, our independence stems from it.

Once you’ve found the right person to share your life with, your ability increases due to their support. A happy childhood helps to create a happy and directed adulthood. Whilst good parenting can greatly assist in the development of the next generation, the attachment to a parent can be massively misunderstood. Often, it’s the cross-gender relationship that carries the deepest love. The same gender relationship can be more emotionally fraught with jealousy, with blame being commonplace.

Having a secure base allows even an infant to adventure and explore with confidence. The knowledge of a supportive attachment offers greater opportunity to be yourself. Sharing the value of experience gives an easier route to develop and learn. Challenges are more able to be overcome by having the security of another person’s close connection. Feeling secure is an enormous enabler of ability, creativity, and the willingness to take risks. We can potentially fulfil our dreams in confidence.

When you have the reassurance of a dependable relationship, your mind is free to focus on other matters. So, whilst attachment in a relationship is a necessary part of growth, without it it can be very limiting. The crazy Covid events of this year have led to breakdowns in previously bearable situations. We’re seeing the outcome of it now on a weekly basis. It would appear that some of those partnerships were never built on solid foundations. On the contrary, the lock-down also developed some of the most powerful connections possible.

Finding the right person to depend on is the universal relationship challenge. How do you assess the value of a partnership without the in-depth information of someone’s personality? We have methodology for finding out the ultimate purpose, the emotional strength, and the physical power of anyone. This is priceless information that can be accessed through the Healthy Happy Hub easily and usually for free or in our very reasonably priced workshops. Strangely, many people repeat their mistakes over and over.

Physically, the stress of work and disharmony in relationships regularly affects blood pressure and mental stability. Our emotional wellbeing influences our happiness and ultimately our health. By having a clear view of the needs for attachment, and the benefits of attachment, we can begin to understand how to bring positivity to life. It used to be commonly said that ‘behind every successful man is a great woman.’ The truth is that behind any successful person, somewhere there is a great inspiring relationship.

Namaste. Om Shanti. In Peace.




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